yeah, i'm around

just not feeling particularly talkative at the moment.

givin' it away now

i don't have much left in a material way, but i'm giving it away.

it's the second phase of the "great divesting" of 2007.

while it was incredibly freeing to get rid of nearly all of my possessions, i've noticed lately that i've become more and more attached than i'd like to be to the few remaining things i've got left - like, oh i don't know - say my computer and my cash.

ok, i'm not giving the computer away quite yet, but the cash - it's time to start letting go. all my fear in the world has become concentrated there. so it's time to cross that last hurdle if i want to be fear-free.

it's strange. it's been a habit for most of my life to worry about not having enough. and although my habit is doing its best to worry, I am not. i'm just giving it away.

ok. not all at once. baby steps. but still...

1 degree weather:the good, bad and the, uh, good and bad

the good: i get to wear my favorite amazing bosnia second-hand shop furry winter coat

note how the "fur" and my hair are pretty much the exact same
color and texture

the bad-ish: i get to wear a kleenex wrapped around and shoved up my nose alot. 

a lot.

boy was that offal stew fabulous!

sure, it was offal but man, was it was good.

slow cooked in a big pot suspended over a fire all day while everyone stood around in the freezing cold drinking domaće vino and rakija.

i could not get enough.

apparently my slow transition to in-your-face carnivore is complete.

offal stew. from freshly slaughtered pig.

but first, we had other bits of pig (i mean, really, if you're going to kill a living being, at least have the decency to make use of it all) served up in other interesting ways. there was, of course, prosciutto, then sausage, and then chunks of fat fried up with some spices.

but lordy lordy was that offal stew tasty. smelled like thanksgiving. mmmm, mmmm, especially whatever in the world it was in there that looked like chunks of muscle meat (except for the big empty veins visible on every side) but were all soft and spongy when you bit in.

mmmm, mmmm, good!

just another family night in bosnia

if you don't speak serbian

z's bro

you don't have to listen...

dude, am i shrinking? am i really that small?

z's mom, me and z's aunt, who i am supposed to refer to as my aunt since i've been
around - albeit on and off - enough to officially be considered family.
so i've got that going for me... which is nice...

the "luna park"

don't know why they call it that, but that's what they call it.

i call it a little traveling carnival.

whatever the name, there's been one set up a block from my place for the last week.

z took his daughter and a gang o' 12 year old girls there last night while i enjoyed a little peace and quiet alone. ah the luxury of a hot bath...

well, that's something i thought i'd never see

z's mom stripping down to her undies, getting on the floor and doing (well, at least trying trying to do) yoga with me.

and yet i did see it.

i remember the good ole' days...

... not so long ago i was in a different place every few weeks or days.

it's weird to be in one place for so long. weirder still when the one place i've been for so long happens to be the same city in which z's family lives.

got a phone call this morning. it was z's mom. "either you come here for lunch or i'm coming there and making lunch for you." (though that was all said in serbian)

four hours later...

pršut, bacon, salami, sir, paprika, chilis, bread and ljuti ajvar

sarma

kolač (cake)

and a house full of people

(z's brother, mom, and daughter)

today

it's cold and grey and wintery (ok, technically autumn-y) and slow.

i did some stuff. slowly.

first some yoga.

then i hand-washed the 2 pair of "new very good" (that's what it said on the label) wool socks that z's mom gave us and put them on the radiator to dry.

then i washed my hair. this is how much came out. it's pretty much how much comes out every time i wash my hair and yet i continue to have gobs of hair on my head.

then z made a little lunch for me and i sat on the sofa and listened to sada sat kaur's "mantra masala" cd while i looked out the window.

i took a photo of z painting in the other room.


and now it's 4:30 and it's already getting dark.

just like that, the day is over.


just like that.